


The Ghosts In My Head

by Watabi12



Category: Black Veil Brides, Cobra Starship, Panic! at the Disco, The Academy Is..., Young Veins
Genre: Fluff, Gender Identity, Gender Issues, Homophobia, M/M, Transphobia, alternative universe, physical assault, screenplay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-05
Updated: 2016-05-05
Packaged: 2018-06-06 11:14:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6751711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Watabi12/pseuds/Watabi12
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>William knows that he is not the man that everyone else sees but he can't escape the ghosts in his head.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Ghosts In My Head

**Author's Note:**

> This is the screenplay that I submitted for my Second Year Creative Writing assessment. It was fanfic in my head so I changed it and uploaded! I hope that you enjoy it. <3
> 
> INT = Internal setting  
> EXT = External setting  
> V/O = Voice over
> 
> The formatting is a little off but I hope that doesn't bother anyone too much. (I have just spent 6 hours finishing this script but just wanted to upload the fanfic version while I could.)

 

INT: BEDROOM, MILTON KEYNES, EARLY EVENING, 2005.

WILLIAM is sitting down at the dresser. He is twenty three, tall and skinny with dark features and dark, long hair. He tucks his long hair behind his ears. He places black, circular studs into his ears, fastening dog-tags around his neck. He delicately applies eyeliner, eyeshadow, mascara, foundation and lipstick. He pauses and looks at himself in the mirror. He is wearing a printed t-shirt, black leggings and a skirt. He smiles at himself. He stands up and goes down the stairs.

 

INT: HALLWAY, CONTINUOUS.

William’s hand is on the front door handle. He’s shaking. He shuffles his feet on the spot. He begins to weep. He backs away and runs back up the stairs.

 

INT: BATHROOM, CONTINUOUS.

William closes the bathroom. He turns the shower on and jumps in with his clothes on. All the makeup runs off as he is crying.

 

INT: BEDROOM, CONTINOUS.

William is sitting on a bed looking at a full length mirror wearing only underwear. He is alone. The clothes he had just taken off are strewn on the floor and his pyjamas are beside him.

 

WILLIAM (V/0):

Everyone wears a mask; hides the truth from the light; afraid of revealing too much. As if being too aware is dangerous – knowing too much about yourself is dangerous. We all have people we once were and are yet still to be. All living. All breathing. All feeling. Funny, isn’t it? How many faces one person can have – the ones they present to the world and the ghosts that get trapped in the dark space of a person’s head; whispers of who they really are. Constant evolution from day to day. Just to blend into a crowd on a busy street; in a busier world.

 

William stands up and steps towards the mirror. He is staring intently at himself. He wraps his arm around his chest and sighs.

 

WILLIAM (V/O)

The ghosts circling around inside your head; filling up space weightlessly. It’s enough to get lost. If the ghosts don’t resemble you – it’s only a matter of time before you become one of them.

 

William’s fingertips touch lightly at the mirror over his face. The door opens and Gabe’s strolls through it. William’s immediately rushes back to the bed, placing his pyjama top onto his body.

             

GABE

                   You okay, BILVY?

                       

                        WILLIAM

                   Yeah. Are you?

 

                        GABE

               (Whilst getting ready for bed)

You don’t have to pretend to me. I am your partner, you know? You can tell me anything.

 

WILLIAM

I just. Sometimes I feel like I’m a ghost of who I am. Is this me? Is this it? I just don’t know.

 

William continues to get dressed and into bed next to Gabe. Gabe holds him close.

 

                        GABE

You’re not alone in this. I’m right here. If you want to be a boy or a girl or a unicorn or anything - then it makes no difference to me. I still love you.

 

                        WILLIAM

It’s just all such a blur in my head. I don’t know how to let myself even begin –

 

GABE

Well, we’ll work it out. Don’t worry. But right now, sleep is what we both need. I’m late to work every day because of you.

 

GABE kisses WILLIAM.

GABE

          I love you. You’re going to be okay.

 

                        WILLIAM

                    Love you too.

 

INT: BEDROOM, CONTINUOUS.

WILLIAM is standing in front of the mirror. He is wearing black skinny jeans and a shirt. He stares at the mirror. The reflection in the mirror is him – however he is wearing eyeliner, red lipstick, his hair is perfectly straightened and a leather jacket sits over his t-shirt, PHARMACY on his feet. His gaze is fixed on the mirror.

He starts to run through the door in the house. He enters the kitchen and grabs a glass of water. He glances at his reflection in the kitchen window. The reflection is the same. He drops the glass of water on the floor.

 

INT: BEDROOM, MORNING, CONTINOUS.

 

WILLIAM wakes up. GABE stirs beside him.

 

                        GABE

              Hey. Are you okay?

 

                        WILLIAM

                  (Breathing heavily)

              Yeah. I’m fine. Don’t fuss.

                  

                        GABE

              What happened?

 

                        WILLIAM

              Nothing. You’re going to be late for work.

 

                        GABE

What are you going to do whilst I’m at work today?

         

                        WILLIAM

Probably do the food shopping and then come back and start working.

 

          GABE

Remember to pick up some Ben and Jerry’s.

             

WILLIAM

I will.

 

Gabe kisses William on the head.

 

                        WILLIAM

              Have a good day at work.

 

                        GABE

              You too, babe. I’ll call you at lunch.

 

                        WILLIAM

              Go. Before you’re late.

         

                        GABE

Alright. Alright. Ball buster. I’ll go get ready.

 

WILLIAM laughs and lays back down. He pulls the covers over himself anxiously.

 

INT: KITCHEN, CONTINUOUS.

WILLIAM is fully dressed. He is sat at the table, eating breakfast with the radio on. He looks around. The clocks tick. The house creaks. Rain hits the windowpanes. WILLIAM abandons his food. He stares into space.

 

The sounds raise in volume.

A beat.

 

SFX: Radio.

          RADIO PRESENTER

That was the legend that is David Bowie. I remember the first time that I saw him on top of the pops. He looked glamorous and androgynous as ever. My parents hated him. Glam rock was in fashion and everyone looked like him. It’d look ridiculous today though. But there we go.

 

WILLIAM gets up and switches the radio off.

 

He pauses. He leans against the counter, biting his bottom lip. He leaves the bowl on the table and walks towards the door. He puts on his shoes and coat, grabbing his car keys from the bowl by the side. He opens the door and heads towards the car, closing the front door behind him.

 

INT: SHOPPING CENTRE, CONTINUOUS.

WILLIAM wanders around. His legs are stiff and his body is tense. He walks into PHARMACY, tucking his hair behind his ear.

 

INT: PHARMACY, CONTINUOUS.

WILLIAM lingers at the entrance, glancing over at the makeup. He sighs, moving towards the makeup counter slowly, glancing around him. He goes along one of the isles and stops at the first one. He reads ‘BARRY M’ in large, red letters. He reaches out to touch the eyeliner tubes. He stares down at it in his hand. He doesn’t see the PHARMACY ASSISTANT approaching him.

 

PHARMACY ASSISTANT

Are you okay there, sir?

 

WILLIAM

                   (Startled)

              Um. Yeah. I’m, err, fine.

 

WILLIAM stuffs the eyeliner back onto the shelf. He turns to face her but avoids eye contact with her. His hands dig into his pockets nervously to stop him fidgeting.

 

                        PHARMACY ASSISTANT

Are you buying something for your girlfriend today?

 

                        WILLIAM

              Something like that.

 

                        PHARMACY ASSISTANT

Well, if you need any help – just ask. Within the BARRY M range, the nail polishes are the most popular. Nail polishes are the safest option as a gift.

 

                        WILLIAM

                   (Smiling nervously)

              Thanks.

 

The woman smiles back at him and retreats down the aisle until she is out of sight.

WILLIAM blinks at the makeup. He pulls out his phone from his pocket. He listens to it ring.

 

INT: GABE’S OFFICE, CONTINUOUS.

                            

GABE

Hello. Wilton Estate. GABE speaking.

 

INT: WILLIAM IN THE SHOP, CONTINOUS.

                            

WILLIAM

                        Hey. It’s only me.

 

INT: GABE’S OFFICE, CONTINUOUS.

GABE

Oh, hey. How are you today, sir? Are you having a good day?

 

INT: WILLIAM IN THE SHOP, CONTINUOUS.

 

                             WILLIAM

Sorry. Is someone there? I can call back.

 

INT: GABE’S OFFICE, CONTINUOUS.

 

GABE

That won’t be necessary, sir. How can I help you?

 

INT: WILLIAM IN THE SHOP, CONTINOUS.

 

     WILLIAM

I’m, ugh, just looking at makeup. Wondered what you thought I should get? I wasn’t too sure myself, really. I feel stupid stood here.

 

INT: GABE’S OFFICE, CONTINUOUS.

 

     GABE

Sorry, babe. One of my colleagues was super close. I don’t know. What are you thinking?

 

                             WILLIAM

Nail Polish? Maybe Eyeliner? I don’t know. You don’t think they’ll know, do you?

 

     GABE

That it’s for you? No, of course not. All of that sounds hot to me.

 

     WILLIAM

You really think so?

 

     GABE

Hell yeah. You’ll look great.

 

    

WILLIAM

If you say so. Remember to call me at lunch?

 

          GABE

I will. Speak to you later, Panda.

 

WILLIAM

              Bye, hedgehog.

 

WILLIAM approaches the till, seeing the lady that approached him earlier. There is no queue. He places the products on the counter. She smiles at him.

 

                        PHARMACY ASSISTANT

              Made a decision then?

 

                        WILLIAM

              Yeah.

                  

                        PHARMACY ASSISTANT

Did you find everything that you were looking for?

 

                        WILLIAM

              Yeah. Thank you.

 

                        PHARMACY ASSISTANT

I’m sure she’ll love what you picked out for her.

 

                        WILLIAM

              I hope so.

 

INT: LIVING ROOM, CONTINUOUS.

WILLIAM is on his laptop, working. RYAN is sitting beside him. His legs are crossed and he is facing WILLIAM. WILLIAM is facing forward.

 

                             RYAN

You are so boring now that you are starting up your own business.

          WILLIAM

Well, some of us can’t serve hot guys all night.

 

                            

RYAN

I know that I’m all your aspirations. Perfect in every way.

 

          WILLIAM

Shut up. The _adults_ are working.

 

          RYAN

Come to the club tomorrow.

 

          WILLIAM

I can’t.

 

          RYAN

BILVY! Come on. I’ll be there. You can bring GABE. It’ll be fun. You remember what fun is, right?

 

          WILLIAM

Arsehole.

 

          RYAN

That’s me. I have a badge of honour and everything so it’s master arsehole to you.

 

          WILLIAM

Fuck off.

 

RYAN

Seriously, BILVY. Come out. Just this once. Please. Please, please, please. It’s Trans night.

 

                             WILLIAM  

                 (WILLIAM shrugs his shoulders)

Why would that matter?

                  

                             RYAN

              BILVY. Just say you’ll come. We’re still young.

             

                             WILLIAM

                 (Shoving RYAN and laughing)

I know. Fine. If it will shut you up then GABE and I can make an appearance but I’m not promising we’ll stay, alright?

 

              RYAN

Yes. I knew I could break you.

 

              WILLIAM

Don’t you have somewhere else to hang out?

 

              RYAN

Oh, BILVY. You know there’s no place that I’d rather be.

 

              WILLIAM

I have work to do. I’ll see you at the club tomorrow.

 

INT: BEDROOM, EVENING, CONTINUOUS.

GABE and WILLIAM are lying in bed together. WILLIAM has makeup on his face and earrings in his ears. GABE is stroking his hair as he holds him.

                             GABE

Do you even know how beautiful you are?

 

          WILLIAM

Shut up. You are.

 

          GABE

You are everything to me.

 

WILLIAM shakes his head.

                             GABE

              You are. You’re amazing.

                  

                             WILLIAM

              Even like this?

 

                             GABE

              Hell yeah. You’re hot.

 

                             WILLIAM

              You really think so?

 

                             GABE

Are you kidding? Of course I do. I love you.

 

          WILLIAM

Love you too.

                       

GABE

              Come here, panda.

 

GABE pulls WILLIAM towards him and kisses him on the lips. He continues to kiss him down the neck.

 

                             GABE

You are the most beautiful person in this world, WILLIAM BECKETT.

 

                             WILLIAM

                        (Whispering)

Thank you. Oh. By the way, I said we’d go to some night at the club tomorrow. Ry thinks we’re turning into an old, boring couple.

 

                             GABE

              What’s the night?

             

                             WILLIAM

Well, it’s, uh, Trans night. I don’t even want to go. He –

 

                             GABE

              Let’s go. It might even be fun.

 

                             WILLIAM

              I – You really think we should?

 

                             GABE

I can’t remember the last time we went out. I say let’s do it. It’ll be alright, you know.

 

WILLIAM remains silent.

         

                             GABE

I know that you don’t believe me but that doesn’t make it any less true.

 

                        WILLIAM

                   (Sliding out of his pyjamas)

              Let’s just enjoy this for once.

 

INT: HALLWAY, NIGHT, CONTINUOUS.

 

WILLIAM is leaning against the wall by the stairs, waiting for GABE. He is tapping his fingers against the wall and fidgeting. He is wearing silver, metallic leggings with a white t-shirt. His makeup is perfect. The taxi honks outside.

 

                        GABE (from upstairs)

              I’m coming. Just give me a second.

 

WILLIAM slips into black PHARMACY and checks the contents of his bag. He sighs when GABE doesn’t come down the stairs. He takes his compact mirror out of his pocket and WILLIAM wipes at his face. He flinches when he hears GABE at the top of the stairs. GABE rushes down them.

 

                        GABE

                   (Slipping into his shoes)

              Sorry, babe. I’m totally ready.

                       

WILLIAM

Are you – are you sure this is a good idea? We could just stay in tonight, you know. Make a night of it.

 

WILLIAM steps toward GABE, his hand reaches out for his neck and their lips slide together. GABE pulls back first.

                        GABE

                   (Whispering)

Don’t be nervous. It’s going to be fine. I’m going to stay by your side. Ry will be there. It’s going to be a good night, I promise.

 

                             WILLIAM

              Hedgehog. Are you sure?

 

                             GABE

Yes. Now, the taxi is waiting so we should go. I’ll be right behind you.

 

                             WILLIAM

              Can you?

                             GABE

              After you, babe.

 

                             WILLIAM

              I can’t. Will you just open the door?

 

                             GABE

              It’s okay. Yeah, of course. Here.

 

GABE places his hand into WILLIAM’s.

 

                             GABE

              Together. We’ll do this together.

 

GABE turns the front door handle and the door opens. They walk holding hands into the taxi. WILLIAM hastily ducks in and GABE follows him.

 

INT: IN THE TAXI, CONTIUOUS.

 

                             TAXI DRIVER

              Where to?

 

                             GABE

              The Pink Flamingo.

 

                             TAXI DRIVER

That’s down town, right?

                  

                             GABE

              Yeah. That’s the one.

             

GABE squeezes WILLIAM’s hands and smiles across at him. WILLIAM doesn’t smile back. WILLIAM looks out of the car window.

 

EXT: PINK FLAMINGOS, CONTINUOUS.

There is a large building with a flamingo and a sign that reads ‘Pink Flamingo’ written across it. There are people lined up outside and two bouncers at the door. As WILLIAM walks past still holding GABE’s hand, he sees drag-queens smoking. He lingers when he walks them but GABE pulls him along.

 

GABE approaches the bouncer with WILLIAM trailing behind.

 

                             GABE

                   Bilvy Beckett. We know Ry.

 

THE BOUNCER nods and lets them in.

 

INT: PINK FLAMINGOS, CONTINUOUS.

 

There are multi coloured flashing lights and a drag-queen singing at the front of the stage with people watching her and others dancing to the music. Nearer to the bar, there are more tables and people are sitting at the back talking to each on tables or in booths.

 

WILLIAM and GABE head straight to the bar. RYAN is standing behind the bar dressed in a tight black t-shirt and denim jeans. He is arranging glasses with his back to the house. WILLIAM smirks at the sight of RYAN and breaks free GABE’s grip.

 

                             WILLIAM

          The staff are quite shit in here tonight.

 

                             RYAN

                        (Turning around)

Well, I’m sorry that you – BILVY? No way. You are here. Am I high? Did you slip something in my drink earlier?

 

WILLIAM laughs.

 

                             RYAN

GABE. Shit. I haven’t seen you in too long. How are you doing, man? I’m assuming I have you to thank for BILVY’s beautiful face tonight.

 

                             GABE

Well, he did try to back out but I keep on a tight leash at home so it wasn’t that difficult to get him here.

 

RYAN chuckles. WILLIAM has turned to look at the show in front of them.

 

                        RYAN

I don’t doubt it. Can I get you guys drinks? Pink Flamingos are two for one tonight.

 

          GABE

Well, with an offer like that – how can I resist?

 

          RYAN

Is he okay?

 

They both glance towards WILLIAM.

 

                             GABE

I think so. I mean, he’s here. He seems okay. I’m going to keep watching but I’m hoping he’ll feel okay with – you know – there being more trans people around.

 

              RYAN

I know a really cool agender person. Maybe we could get them talking later. I think it would be good for WILLIAM to talk to someone like him.

 

 

                             WILLIAM

     I need some air. I’m going to go outside.

    

                             GABE

     Do you want me to-?

             

                             WILLIAM

     No, it’s fine. Stay here. I’ll be right back.

 

WILLIAM pushes through the crowd of people, out of the building.

 

EXT: IN THE STREET, CONTINUOUS.

He wanders around in the dark to the side of the building, looking at the stars. He breathes in and out heavily, pressing his back against the brick wall of the building. There is silence. WILLIAM stirs when he hears a voice. He runs towards the sound and realises it is coming from a darkened alleyway. He walks forward slowly towards the sound and into the alleyway. He sees a group of middle aged, white men chasing and heckling a young, feminine looking boy. There is a bearded man leading the gang.

 

                        SHANE

          Oi! Darling, dropped your purse?

 

The boy walks faster. But the men start to run after him. WILLIAM watches as two of them hold him, rage plastered across his face.

                        ANDY

Help! Help! Anyone please? Please help me! What the fuck is your problem?

 

                        GANG MEMBER 1

You are everything that has lead this society to the dogs. Little faggot. Fucking pussy.

                            

ANDY

          Shut the fuck up. Please! Help me!

 

SHANE and the two men behind him move forward. WILLIAM steps towards the scene in silence with his fists balled by his side.

 

                        SHANE

Did daddy not love you enough? So you had to get your fill of guys somewhere else? Is that why you dress like a girl? Disgusting little tranny.

 

                        ANDY

                   (Crying)

          Fuck off. You’re the one without love. Not me.

 

SHANE hits Andy in the stomach, his whole body shudders. WILLIAM runs towards them.

 

                        WILLIAM

          Hey! What the fuck are you doing?

 

                        GANG MEMBER 2

Who the fuck are you? This one of your pussy friends?

 

          WILLIAM

You want to fight someone then fucking bring it on. But you leave that kid alone. What did he ever do to you?

 

          GANG MEMBER

You look like a girl. You probably hit like one too.

 

          WILLIAM

We’ll see about that.

 

WILLIAM reaches forwards and hits the man in the face. The other two men crowd around WILLIAM easily and start to hit him. WILLIAM fights back. The other men push the boy to the ground and begin to relent. SHANE nods at them and the two men force WILLIAM against the wall of the club. SHANE closes in on WILLIAM, invading his personal space until their skin almost touches.

 

                        SHANE

Go suck a cock and choke to death on it. Tranny faggot.

 

The men quickly disappear. WILLIAM is shuddering. He breathes against the wall for a second.

 

                        WILLIAM

Hey. Are you – are you okay, there? Can I call someone, um?

 

          ANDY

My name’s Andy.

WILLIAM slowly limps towards him. He grabs his arms and helps to pull him up onto to his feet.

 

                        WILLIAM

WILLIAM. Are you okay? You, um, look pretty awful. How old are you?

 

          ANDY

So do you. That was a really brave thing you did. I’m sixteen. The worst thing is that I’m not even gay. Dudes are just not my thing.

 

Andy and WILLIAM look at each other for a second and start laughing.

 

                        WILLIAM

          Talking back like that was brave too.

 

Andy shrugs.

 

                        ANDY

We can’t let them win, you know? I mean, I – err – was only at the club because my sister is a lesbian. She’s inside probably. I’m not even – I just like looking good. But hate is blind and it’ll be there whatever you do - so might as well try to be happy.

         

WILLIAM

          I guess that you’re right.

 

                        ANDY

They will never win, you know. Every time we get beaten down, we’ll come back stronger.

 

          WILLIAM

Are you sure there’s nothing I can -?

 

GABE approaches.

 

                        ANDY

No, I’ll be fine. It was nice meeting you. Maybe I’ll see you around here again some time.

 

WILLIAM limps towards GABE, away from Andy.

 

                        GABE

Oh my God! What the hell happened to you? Are you -? You’re all bruised.

 

GABE pouts and wraps his arms around WILLIAM’s shoulders.

 

                        GABE

          We need to get you home.

 

WILLIAM rolls his eyes and smiles.

 

INT: WILLIAM AND GABE’S HOUSE, ENSUITE BATHROOM, CONTINUOUS.

 

WILLIAM is sitting on the edge of the bath tub. He winces as GABE dabs at his bruises and cuts.

 

                        GABE

I cannot believe that you would do that. You silly thing. You could have been seriously hurt.

 

          WILLIAM

The kid needed help. They might have left him for dead, GABE. I couldn’t just stand by and let them do that.

 

          GABE

You silly panda. That was such a stupid, brave and amazing thing for you to do.

 

          WILLIAM

You’re not mad, are you?

 

          GABE

     (Softly spoken)

You great big softie. Trying to play the hero like that! I’m proud of you, you idiot.

 

                        WILLIAM

                   (Still wincing)

          I love you.

 

                        GABE

          I love you too.

 

                        WILLIAM

Everything is going to be alright. I know it is.

 

          GABE

Me too.

 

The couple kiss.

 

                        WILLIAM

              (laughing)

          Careful. That hurts.

 

                        GABE

          Okay, Superman.

 

INT: HALLWAY, MORNING, CONTINUOUS.

 

WILLIAM is in the bedroom, sitting at the dressing table. He is wearing blue dungarees with black PHARMACY. He applies eyeliner, mascara to his eyes. Then pale foundation and red lipstick. He tucks his long, dark hair behind his ears and smiles to himself in the mirror. He travels down the stairs and grabs his wallet and keys on the table, putting them in his pocket. He steps towards the door, his hand lingering on the door handle. He breathes.

                      

WILLIAM (V/O)

Until that day. The day where you realise that ghosts can fade; masks can slip – the truth never escapes the light for long. The moment that you choose not to be a ghost; to drop the mask – that’s the only moment that counts. The moment that you look at yourself; your life and say: ‘I choose this. I choose to be happy.’ The ghosts will stay alive in memory but they will never control you again. All that pain. All that suffering – the long journey there – fades away, becomes the ghost that you once were.

 

He smiles to himself. He pulls the door handle, opening the door.

 

                             WILLIAM (V/O)

You’re not lost or invisible. You’re alive. You are free.

 

As his foot touches the ground a bright light floods the doorway from outside.


End file.
